In an effort to stay in touch in a busy world or connect with a broader audience, we are bombarded by electronic gadgetry. (Dare I say enslaved by it?) But is all this really leading to a deeper connection?
In my work, I have the opportunity to collaborate with people all over the globe. It’s
exciting to work on a project with someone from Australia or talk with someone in the UK at the push of a button. Working globally like this 100 years ago was practically unheard of, or at the very least, extremely costly and not nearly as simple.
With the tools at our disposal today, it truly becomes a small world. Yet in all this connection and collaboration, I’ve begun to feel disconnected. Recently, I was on a call with a fellow coach and she commented that she felt there was some disconnection happening for me. I broke down in tears, as her words echoed exactly what I was feeling.
How could it be that with all the attempts at interacting in this global online business I would feel disconnected? Empty? Deflated?
As we talked, I began to realize I was busy expending a tremendous amount of energy attempting to connect with people left and right through various social media platforms, but that much of it felt hollow.
There is a piece missing for me. I crave not just the talking and surface connection, but a deeper knowing. My desire is to know the people I’m typing with. What are their hopes? Their dreams? What lights them up? What do they take a stand for?
And I have a desire to be known. Yet sometimes it can feel like I’m standing on a deserted street corner shouting my story into the wind. Because people are bombarded by messages from a million different online avenues.
My connection to myself began to suffer through all this, as I chased my piece of the online pie. I began to use technology to connect globally, yes, but also to tune out everything that was happening internally.
While it is an amazing tool, technology can become the next best way to check out. Who needs drugs, alcohol, binge shopping, and over eating? There are other ways to escape what’s truly going on. Technology can be an easy way to numb out.
Before you extol the benefits of the online realm and all it’s done for business or in reconnecting people with lost friends and loved ones; I’ll give that side a big thumbs up. I wouldn’t have met the majority of the people I’ve talked with in the past 6 months if it weren’t for the whole tech she-bang.
But like many double edged swords, picking up one’s phone or tablet out of habit (or boredom) is becoming standard behavior which adds to a dissociated state.
There’s a place for tech. But here is what I have learned in spending many of my waking hours living in an online world:
1. It can be extremely draining to constantly be immersed in techno-crap.
2. There is a built in wall with this method of connecting.
3. The constant connection by computer, phone, tablet—now even from your WRIST—can be a slippery slope into becoming completely disconnected from what is happening internally for you. And in the world in front of your nose.
4. A virtual hug is not the same as a real live body.
THE CHALLENGE
Last month I led a virtual 10-day challenge entitled “ReTreat Yourself.” During those 10 days, one of the things I challenged the group to do was this: Unplug.
Schedule in disconnect time. Turn it all off. Every Last Device.
For some people, the thought may cause a momentary panic. I assure you, you’ll be ok. Sound impossible? What if you simply did it for 10 minutes each day? Then increase it by 5 minutes each week. Be purposeful about it, and schedule it in.
Which areas in your life would benefit from creating these daily unplugged moments?
Technology can allow us to connect with loved ones who are too far away to see on a regular basis. This is a beautiful thing! It’s the mindless, distracted always-on-social-media “connecting” that begins to separate us from ourselves and those around us.
It cultivates a culture of pseudo-connectedness that can distract and detract from those things which really feed the soul, create joy and bring the here and now into focus.
Much like a garden requires nurturing to take hold and thrive, so does life. Make a commitment to yourself; No more hiding. No distractions. No more checking out. It’s time to re-connect deeply with life.
And sometimes that level of connecting requires pulling the plug.